No Set Schedule

My mother always did certain things on certain days of the week. Wednesday was laundry day, Saturday was the day to change the sheets on the beds and empty the trash, Thursday was grocery shopping day. I have always tried to make that type of routine work for me, but clearly, it never has. Left feeling inadequate and guilty because my house did not hum the way my mother's did, I decided, after 40 some years, to finally let it all go. It's okay to not have the neatest or cleanest house; it's okay to take time for myself. Ah, with age comes wisdom.

Like many of you, my day shifts from one task to the next and not always seamlessly, I might add. I don't always wake up on Monday morning feeling like I want to clean the bathroom. Sometimes I wake up feeling like I want to do the laundry, clean out a closet, or bake bread. Sometimes one of my daughters will call and suggest an outing with the grandkids. Sadly, in my mother's world that never happened and just as sadly, as a young mother, I followed in her footsteps. I always put the house before my own enjoyment, spending time with the kids, enriching myself, or strengthening friendships. Boy we both missed out on a lot of really important and fun activities.

It's never too late to teach an old dog new tricks so I am happy to throw routine out the window and take each day as it comes. As a good friend once said, "let the day unfold upon itself."  Sounds good to me.

Joining the Y

It's been quite some time since I posted on this blog, but believe me, it's not because I haven't wanted to, it's because things have been mucho crazy and as usual the things I want to do seem to always fall to the bottom of the list. I've always been that way, how about you?

I'm so happy and excited because I've taken what I see as the first step in no longer putting myself last. I've joined the YMCA and am elated to be sharing this news. Why, you might ask? Well, (here goes, wait for it), it's because I always felt guilty about spending money on myself! OK, so there, I've said it! Like so many of you, I did not feel worthy. But, hey, I did it this time and that's why I'm so giddy.

I joined the Y on Monday and have only taken one class so far - Core Conditioning, on Wednesday. Believe me, I am feeling it today. I hurt in parts I didn't even know I had. I also signed up for three sessions with a personal trainer which cost even more money. Have I lost my mind? The best part of this is that it's prompted me to do other things that are for ME. One, I'm eating better - less junk, more nutrition, smaller portions. Two, I went for a walk today which is something I always want to do, but always find excuses not to do, and three, I told a friend "no" when she made a request that went against a decision that I had already made for myself. Gosh, this just might become contagious. I feel like I'm stepping out of my comfort zone and I love the feeling of adventure that comes with this new-found freedom. I hope it lasts because it feels liberating, and right, and necessary in order for me to grow and change. Wish me luck!